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What Is Ghosting?

When a Friend or Romantic Interest Disappears Without Explanation

Wendy Rose Gould is a lifestyle reporter with over a decade of experience covering health and wellness topics.

ghosting definition slang

 Verywell / Catherine Song

  • Increased Use
  • Why It Happens
  • How to Cope
  • Why You Shouldn't Ghost

Alternatives to Ghosting Someone

  • Is It Ever OK?

Ghosting is a relatively new colloquial dating term that refers to abruptly cutting off contact with someone without giving that person any warning or explanation for doing so.

Even when the person being ghosted reaches out to re-initiate contact or gain closure, they’re met with silence. As you can see, it’s called ghosting because it involves someone essentially “vanishing” into thin air as if they were a ghost.

The term is generally used in reference to a romantic relationship, but it can technically refer to any scenario where contact unexpectedly ceases, including friendships and family relationships.

Signs of Ghosting

Ghosting is often obvious, but it can also be a gradual process. The other person might start by 'soft ghosting,' where they progressively minimize contact over a period of time. Some early signs that someone might be ghosting you include:

  • They regularly bail out on plans to get together
  • They struggle to make commitments
  • They don't like to share personal information
  • They don't want you to meet their friends or family
  • They disappear from social media
  • They rarely respond to your texts or calls
  • Your conversations with them lack depth, and they seem disinterested

If you have made repeated efforts to contact someone and they won't respond, it is a strong indicator that you've been ghosted.

Ghosting can also occur on social media. It involves cutting off all social media contact with another person without explanation. The other person may unfriend, unfollow, or even block you on all social media platforms. They may even go so far as to deactivate or delete their social accounts to prevent all contact.

The History of Ghosting

The term "ghosting" became mainstream about seven years ago alongside the surge in online dating ; it became an official entry in the Merriam-Webster dictionary in 2017 . Interestingly, though, the term was actually used as far back as the 1990s. Some pop culture writers and scholars have even used the term to describe ghostwriting in hip-hop music.  

Bree Jenkins, LMFT

The word ‘ghosting’ gained popularity long before [2017] via ‘90s hip-hop, often in the sense of escaping.

Though a new term, the act of ghosting existed well before the digital age. “I think references of ‘going for a loaf of bread and never coming back’ are examples of ghosting," says Bree Jenkins, LMFT , a dating coach in Los Angeles, Calif. "Ghosting used to be leaving a person and moving away or not leaving [them with] your contact information—its earlier origins are even the simple act of leaving a party or social gathering without notice and goodbyes.” 

How the Term Became Popular

So why did the term “ghosting” become mainstream just within the last decade? The argument is that online dating has simply made it way easier to ghost people.

With the higher frequency of ghosting instances, and with more people who could relate/understand being ghosted or doing the ghosting, the term was widely adopted.

Why Do Some People Choose to Ghost?

Ghosting is often seen as an immature or passive-aggressive way to end a relationship. In other instances, it may even be a form of emotional abuse.

There are two primary reasons why a person ghosts another, and often it's a combination of the two.

It's the Easy Route

The first is that some find it's way easier (in the short-term, anyway) to ghost someone than to have an awkward, uncomfortable heart-to-heart about why you’re not interested in maintaining contact.

The person doing the ghosting often wants to avoid confrontation or dealing with someone else’s hurt feelings, so they simply cease all communication and hope the hint is delivered.

Option Overload and Fatigue

“With internet dating comes what may seem like infinite choices as opposed to walking into a bar and having limited options," explains Margaret Seide, MD , a board-certified psychiatrist based in New York City.

"Because there are so many choices, online daters are quick to have the ‘OK, next’ or the ‘Yeah, but what else?’ mindset," says Seide. "Sometimes the person is nice enough, but is juggling a few other people and that person just didn’t make the cut.”

There are also other reasons why people ghost, including being fearful of the other person's reaction to rejection.

How Ghosting Can Impact the Ghosted

As you can imagine (or know from personal experience), ghosting can have a real psychological impact on the person who’s being ghosted.

It’s almost like sudden loss [or] grief, especially the first time you’ve ever been ghosted. You are shocked, and you’re in denial, thinking things such as ‘maybe they didn’t see my text.’ Then you feel anger.

Jenkins adds, “Next, the feelings of depression [can] kick in along with feelings of poor self-esteem as you mentally reexamine your relationship and last conversation for possible warning signs."

Ghosting is inherently ambiguous because there is a lack of explanation for why the relationship ended. For the person who has been ghosted, it can lead to significant feelings of rejection, guilt, grief, and shame.

A person who has been ghosted may be left wondering what this type of behavior says about them, but it is important to remember that ghosting says more about the person who cuts off contact than the person who is ghosted.

Working Through Grief After Being Ghosted

The grief cycle may not run that exact course, but being ghosted often triggers a flood of ranging emotions. Thoughts of ‘Not only did the person not want to date me, but I wasn’t even deserving of an explanation’ can make someone feel dehumanized and devalued.

It’s often more painful when it’s a relationship that’s marinated a bit, but the ghosted person can also feel this way if it was a new connection. It can take some time to work through the pain, but with acceptance the person being ghosted can move on.

To gain closure in a situation where you feel you’ve been ghosted, Meide says it can help to send a message by saying something like, “Hey, I haven’t heard from you in a while. I’m not sure what happened, but I don’t want to continue pursuing this. My time is valuable and I don’t want to leave this door open. Best of luck with things.” While the ghoster may not respond, it can help provide closure.

How Ghosting Can Impact the Ghoster

Ghosting doesn't just impact the ghosted; it also is a detriment to the ghoster. The bottom line here is that ghosting is either a passive aggressive way to end a relationship, or it is the “easy way out.” Either way, it’s not doing the ghoster any favors in their ability to communicate with others.

“Ghosting doesn't take into account how you affect other people and it makes it easier for the person to dip out or disengage when things get uncomfortable. There’s no way to have a healthy, long-term relationship without being able to work through problems and use your communication skills,” says Jenkins.

Jenkins adds that ghosters create unhealthy problem-solving patterns for themselves, and that they also contribute to a larger pattern of societal flakiness that increases their chances of being ghosted as well.

Avoiding the easy route of ghosting someone will benefit both parties. Meide says that the best thing you can do when ending a relationship , however long or short, is to treat the other person as you’d like to be treated.

“I usually suggest two spoons of sugar with the medicine in the middle for delivery,” Meide says. “It can sound something like ‘Hey, you seem like a really great catch, but I don’t feel it’s working between us. I respect your time and just wanted to be honest. Warm regards and take care.’

"Or, ‘Hi—it’s been cool getting to know you, but I’ve decided to take a break from dating and don’t want to waste your time or be dishonest. Best of luck with everything.’"

These messages are short, sweet, honest, and end with an outro to signal that you don’t want to have a long and drawn out conversation. It’s possible that you may get a negative or hurt reaction from the other person, but it’s far better to exit the relationship after giving an explanation than to ghost completely.

Is Ghosting Someone Ever OK?

In many cases, ghosting is considered a rude route to take when trying not to talk to someone anymore, or especially when ending a more serious or established relationship. However, there are most definitely exceptions—when further communication can be a bad thing or even potentially unsafe.

Situations in which ghosting can make sense is if you find out the person is married or in a relationship , participating in illegal or unsavory behaviors, or if they display toxic traits.   In such cases, you do not owe that person an explanation for abruptly ending the relationship. 

If you are uncomfortable or feel threatened by someone in any way, remember it's best to follow your gut instinct. You may simply have a bad feeling. In cases like this, you don't need to prove that this person "deserved" to be ghosted—ghosting might be a useful mode of self-protection and peace of mind.

If you feel your best interest would be to completely cut off contact with the person in question, don't let your feelings of guilt keep you from doing what's right for you and what will ultimately keep you safe.

A Word From Verywell

Ghosting has become more commonplace in the digital age, but just because something is easy or common doesn’t mean it’s always the ideal route to take. Consider how ghosting might impact both parties and do your best to treat others with kindness and honesty. If you’re the person who’s been ghosted, it’s OK to feel confused, sad, and angry. Sending a quick note to end the relationship yourself can help you regain a sense of power and confidence in yourself and give you closure.

However, if you feel threatened or deeply uncomfortable by someone, you don't owe them anything. Sometimes ghosting, when used thoughtfully, can be a healthy mode of self-protection and removing yourself from a potentially bad situation.

Navarro R, Larrañaga E, Yubero S, Víllora B. Psychological Correlates of Ghosting and Breadcrumbing Experiences: A Preliminary Study among Adults . Int J Environ Res Public Health . 2020;17(3):1116. doi:10.3390/ijerph17031116

Anderson HE. No Bitin’ Allowed: A Hip-Hop Copying Paradigm for All of Us . 2011.

 Vilhauer J. When Is It OK to Ghost Someone ? Psychology Today . 2019.

By Wendy Rose Gould Wendy Rose Gould is a lifestyle reporter with over a decade of experience covering health and wellness topics.

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ghosting definition slang

The Meaning of Ghosting: What It Is and How To Use It

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What is ghosting, and what does it mean if someone ghosts you on a dating app? This article covers the slang meaning of ghosting.

ghosting definition slang

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You might think that the word ghosting refers to an act by a scary spirit or is related to Halloween. However, this slang term refers to a widespread phenomenon on dating apps. Continue reading to learn about the meaning of ghosting.

ghosting definition slang

What Does the Word Ghosting Mean?

According to Dictionary , the word ghosting refers to abruptly ending contact with a person without warning or explanation. This most often occurs in romantic relationships and is a frequent practice on online dating apps. 

When someone ghosts another person, they cut off all contact at every source. This means blocking someone’s phone number, blocking them on social media, avoiding them, and probably having their friends and social circles avoid the ghosted person, too. This rejection results in a lack of closure for the ghosted person. 

Bottom line? Don’t ghost, have empathy, and confront your feelings.

Why Do People Ghost?

There are many reasons why a person might choose to ghost someone. However, just because these are reasons why a person might ghost doesn’t mean that ghosting isn’t hurtful. It can feel like emotional cruelty, especially if someone is ghosted during a long-term relationship. 

A person might ghost to avoid confrontation of their own shortcomings, there might be outside social circumstances, or a person might ghost because it’s the easy way out. The one circumstance in which ghosting might be acceptable is in a domestic violence situation where the person needs to protect their own safety when leaving their partner. 

How Does Ghosting Feel?

Ghosting can inflict deep emotional pain. For the ghosted person, being suddenly left from a friendship or romantic relationship without cause can lead to depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, heightened emotions, feelings of guilt, and more. These can all reach different levels, even including physical pain. Consider talking to mental health professionals if you have been ghosted.

What Is the Origin of the Word Ghosting?

According to Very Well Mind , the term ghosting actually originated in 1990s hip-hop music, in which ghosting referred to a person who left or moved away and did not leave any way to contact them. It was also used to refer to an Irish goodbye or Irish exit, which is the act of leaving a party without telling anyone. 

As the advent of online dating grew throughout the 2010s, so did the term ghosting. This word was added to the Merriam-Webster dictionary in the year 2017. Online dating has made it easier to completely cut off contact with a person and never reply to them, so ghosting has become more commonplace.

How Can the Word Ghosting Be Used in a Sentence?

There are many ways in which a person might use the word ghosting to describe being abruptly left. These example sentences can help get you started with using the casual word ghosting. Be sure to avoid the word ghosting in professional or formal settings:

She totally ghosted me out of nowhere. I don’t understand today’s dating world. 

I thought we were on track to get married, but then he ghosted me out of the blue. I couldn’t get in contact with his family or friends to figure out what was going on, either. They came to move his stuff out while I was at work one day.

I am a bit nervous to tell the person I went on a few dates with that I don’t want to see them anymore, but I will not ghost someone.

What Are Synonyms of the Word Ghosting?

Ghosting is considered a slang term, but there are many formal or professionals words that you can use its place. Using synonyms for ghosting can also be helpful if a person does not know the meaning of the word and you’re trying to explain it to them. Reference this list of ghosting synonyms from Power Thesaurus when you need one!

  • be lost to sight
  • be lost to view
  • cease to exist
  • cut and run
  • dematerialize
  • pass from sight
  • recede from view

What Are Antonyms of the Word Ghosting?

There are plenty of words that mean the opposite of ghosting and can be used to describe a person appearing out of nowhere. If you’re looking for a word to describe the opposite of ghosting, these antonyms from Power Thesaurus can help get you started.

  • appear again
  • be remembered
  • be repeated
  • come and go
  • come up again
  • coming again
  • crop up again
  • happen again
  • haunt thoughts
  • occur again
  • reappearing
  • return to mind

Ghosting is a phenomenon in which a person cuts off all contact with another person with no explanation or reasoning. This most often happens on online dating and can also happen in long-term romantic relationships or friendships. People find ghosting extremely hurtful, and it can be seen as cowardly.

  • Ghosting | Dictionary.com  
  • Disappear synonyms – 1 194 Words and Phrases for Disappear | Power Thesaurus 
  • What Is ghosting? | Very Well Mind  
  • Reappear Synonyms | Power Thesaurus  

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Kevin Miller is a growth marketer with an extensive background in Search Engine Optimization, paid acquisition and email marketing. He is also an online editor and writer based out of Los Angeles, CA. He studied at Georgetown University, worked at Google and became infatuated with English Grammar and for years has been diving into the language, demystifying the do's and don'ts for all who share the same passion! He can be found online here.

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Ghosting: What It Is, Why It Hurts, and What You Can Do About It

Silk cloth in red light

You’re in a relationship. Suddenly, and maybe without any warning at all, your partner seems to have disappeared. No calls, no text messages, no connection made on social media, no responses to any of your messages. Odds are, your partner hasn’t unexpectedly left town because of a family emergency, and isn’t lying dead in a ditch somewhere but, rather, has simply ended the relationship without bothering to explain or even let you know. You’ve been ghosted.

Who Ghosts and Who Gets Ghosted?

Why would someone choose to simply disappear from another person’s life, rather than plan, at minimum, a conversation to end a relationship? You may never know for sure why you were ghosted. While more studies need to be done specifically on the ghosting phenomenon, past research has looked at different types of attachment personalities and choice of breakup strategies; it’s possible that people with an avoidant type personality (those who hesitate to form or completely avoid attachments to others, often as result of parental rejection), who are reluctant to get very close to anyone else due to trust and dependency issues and often use indirect methods of ending relationships, are more likely to use ghosting to initiate a break-up.

Other research found that people who are believers in destiny, who think that relationships are either meant to be or not, are more likely to find ghosting acceptable than people who believe relationships take patience and work. One study also suggests that people who end relationships by ghosting have often been ghosted themselves. In that case, the ghoster knows what it feels like to have a relationship end abruptly, with no explanation, no room for discussion. Yet they seemingly show no empathy toward the other, and may or may not experience any feelings of guilt over their ghosting behavior.

What it Means to Ghost and Be Ghosted

Ghosting is by no means limited to long-term romantic relationships. Informal dating relationships, friendships, even work relationships may end with a form of ghosting. For the person who does the ghosting, simply walking away from a relationship, or even a potential relationship, is a quick and easy way out. No drama, no hysterics, no questions asked, no need to provide answers or justify any of their behavior, no need to deal with someone else’s feelings. Certainly, while the ghoster may benefit from avoiding an uncomfortable situation and any potential drama, they’ve done nothing to improve their own conversation and relationships skills for the future.

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For the person who is ghosted, there is no closure and often deep feelings of uncertainty and insecurity. Initially, you wonder “what’s going on?” When you realize the other person has ended the relationship, you’re left to wonder why, what went wrong in the relationship, what’s wrong with you, what’s wrong with them, how you didn’t see this coming.

What to Do If You’re Ghosted

Ghosting hurts; it’s a cruel rejection. It is particularly painful because you are left with no rationale, no guidelines for how to proceed, and often a heap of emotions to sort through on your own. If you suffer from any abandonment or self-esteem issues, being ghosted may bring them to the forefront.

In this age of ever-advancing technology, your ghoster is likely to appear on your various forms of social media and, if that’s the case, this person who is now physically gone from your life, is still quite visible. How do you move on? Unfortunately, there’s no magic bullet or proven advice to quickly guide you into recovery from a ghosted heart, but there is common sense.

“Avoid reminders of your ex,” advises Gwendolyn Seidman, Ph.D., Associate Professor of Psychology and Chair of the Psychology Department at Albright College in Pennsylvania. “They’re likely to cause painful emotions to resurface, and they won’t help you get emotional closure or insight into why they broke up with you.”

After you stop torturing yourself by going over old photos, saved old texts, new social media postings, and anything else you think might give you insight into the mind and current whereabouts of your ghoster (and let’s face it, you’re bound to be doing that even if you’re not normally an obsessive person), try to find a new distraction. Perhaps most importantly, know that this probably isn’t about you or anything you did wrong.

“You should realize that if your ex chose the strategy of ghosting to break up with you, it likely tells you something about them and their shortcomings, rather than indicating that the problem lies with you.” Dr. Seidman adds.

In other words, try to move on as quickly and completely as you can. Maintain your dignity and stay focused on your own health, happiness and future, leaving the ghoster to deal with the ultimate repercussions of their own immaturity and lack of courage in the context of a relationship.

  • Freedman G, Powell DN, Le B, Williams KD. Ghosting and destiny: Implicit theories of relationships predict beliefs about ghosting. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships. January 12, 2018. https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/0265407517748791
  • Collins TJ, Gillath O. Attachment, breakup strategies, and associated outcomes: The effects of security enhancement on the selection of breakup strategies. Journal of Research in Personality. January 28, 2012;46:210-222. https://www.academia.edu/1467823/Attachment_breakup_strategies_and_associated_outcomes_The_effects
  • LeFebvre LE. Phantom Lovers: Ghosting as a Relationship Dissolution Strategy in the Technological Age. 219-233 From: The Impact of Social Media in Modern Romantic Relationships (ed. NM Punyanunt-Carter, JS Wrench)
  • Koessler RB. When Your Boo Becomes a Ghost: The Association Between Breakup Strategy and Breakup Role in Experiences of Relationship Dissolution. Electronic Thesis and Dissertation Repository. https://ir.lib.uwo.ca/etd/5402/
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The ultimate guide to ghosting: why people do it, how to respond & more.

Kelly Gonsalves

Your date from last weekend still hasn't texted you back about hanging out again. A promising new lead at work suddenly stopped responding after you shared your rates. The guy on Facebook Marketplace who offered to buy your old television just never came to pick it up, and you never heard from him again.

It comes in many different forms, but the experience of being ghosted is universal. And most of us would probably agree: ghosting sucks.

What is ghosting?

Ghosting is when someone stops responding to messages and disappears from a relationship without explanation, usually in the context of dating. The term can also be used for any situation where a person abruptly stops communicating or showing up, such as when a friend starts ignoring your texts or when an employee just stops showing up to work without ever formally quitting.

"Ghosting exists on a spectrum and can happen at literally any part of dating, from disappearing from a chat on a dating app and unmatching, to leaving your text messages on 'Read' after a date, to cutting off all communication with you after years of dating," explains sex and dating coach Myisha Battle, M.S. "All of this is ghosting behavior."

Many relationship experts discourage ghosting because of the way it affects the person being ghosted. "It leaves the other person to guess at what they did or didn't do to cause you to ditch them. That guessing is the specter that looms in people's lives after a disappearance," Battle tells mbg.

According to clinical psychologist Carla Marie Manly, Ph.D. , that lack of closure can trigger feelings of uncertainty, confusion, anxiety, and even reduced self-esteem in the person being ghosted. "In general, ghosting is disrespectful and tends to perpetuate patterns of dismissiveness and avoidance," she says.

13 examples of ghosting:

  • Ignoring or choosing not to respond to someone's texts or emails indefinitely
  • Leaving someone's text messages on "Read"...forever
  • Going on a date with someone and then never speaking with them again, despite them trying to follow up
  • Unmatching with someone on a dating app in the middle of a conversation without explanation
  • No longer responding to a friend or someone you'd been talking with regularly, even when they reach out multiple times trying to get in touch
  • Suddenly cutting off all communication with someone after dating for months or even years
  • Intentionally responding slowly, briefly, or noncommittally to texts so they eventually stop reaching out
  • Setting up a date with someone and just not showing up, with no explanation, follow-ups, or apology
  • Interviewing someone for a job and then never letting them know if they didn't get the position
  • Quitting your job without telling your employer
  • Suddenly stopping showing up to your sessions with a therapist, personal trainer, etc., without telling them that you're no longer wanting to work with them
  • Scheduling an appointment but then never showing up, without warning or explanation
  • Sending someone a DM but then never saying anything else after they respond

How the term became popularized.

The phenomenon of ghosting has likely been around since the dawn of time. Consider the cavewomen who had to start getting choosy with their sexual partners because they didn't want to birth a child with someone who could disappear without a trace shortly thereafter, or the lovelorn man in Colonial times pouring his heart out in handwritten letters to some distant lover, only to never hear back. Many a '90s rom-com, too, featured a despondent leading lady hovering over a landline telephone for days on end, waiting hopelessly for the guy who took her out a few days ago to call her up and ask her out again. (He often never did.)

While the behavior itself isn't new, the term "ghosting" itself rose to popularity in the early 2010s. In 2015, after online tabloids ran headlines about how Charlize Theron "ghosted" Sean Penn , the New York Times even wrote an explainer on the term, calling it "the ultimate silent treatment." Merriam-Webster added it to the dictionary in 2017.

It makes sense that ghosting would get a lot of people talking around this time: With technology rapidly transforming the speed and ease with which people could communicate with one another, ghosting behavior likely felt even more pronounced than ever. While mailing a letter just to reject someone may have been legitimately too much time and effort back in the day, the fact that people were still disappearing on each other without a trace even now that a kinder closure was literally just a few quick button taps away...harsh!

Dating apps were also just beginning to enter into the cultural mainstream, with Tinder launching in 2012. (Though to be fair, what's often thought of as the world's first online dating site, Match.com , launched in 1995, and we can only imagine people ghosted one another as much then as they do on today's best dating apps .)

In a world where it can feel like you have nearly endless potential people to chat with, it's become easier than ever to start talking to someone regardless of whether you're actually interested in continuing the conversation with them over time. People start to feel like just pictures on your screen rather than real-life humans whose feelings you have to care about. And more starts with less follow-through (and less care) unfortunately means more ghosting.

Why do people ghost?

There are so many reasons why people ghost , but here are a few of the main ones specific to dating:

They've moved on, and they don't care enough about the other person to tell them.

In most cases, people ghost because they're no longer interested in pursuing a relationship with the other person. Instead of telling them that upfront, they go for the easiest and most convenient route: just stop responding.

"Ghosting arises due to a lack of concern and empathy for others," Manly explains, and she notes that this is true in most ghosting situations. It's selfish, passive-aggressive behavior that is grounded, as Manly notes, in dismissiveness and avoidance.

They got too busy or stressed.

The other most common reason for ghosting? They just have a lot going on in their own life.

"Sometimes when people ghost us, it's because they are focused on other things or may be isolating themselves because they are feeling depressed," marriage and family therapist Patrice N. Douglas, LMFT , previously told mbg. "Everything isn't always about us, so we can't panic right away."

They may honestly just be too busy at the moment and distracted by other life happenings, Manly notes, such as work stress, mental health issues, or other challenges. And sometimes a person may forget to respond to a text initially or plan to respond to it later when they have time or energy, but then enough time passes that they feel like there's no point in saying anything anymore.

They're worried about hurting the other person's feelings.

In some cases, people ghost because they don't want to hurt the other person's feelings, Manly adds. But if that's why you're choosing to ghost someone, the truth is that it's counterproductive: "Unfortunately, being ghosted often causes far more irritation and pain than straightforward 'I'm moving on' or 'We're not a good fit' comments might create," she says.

They're uncomfortable with hard conversations.

Ghosting can also happen when someone is just anxious about ending the relationship because they struggle with hard conversations in general. According to licensed counselor Shae Ivie-Williams, LPC, BC-TMH, CCTP , people with certain backgrounds may be more likely to ghost: "[They] may not want to have those hard conversations because maybe their family didn't have hard conversations when they were young," she previously told mbg. "And so having those types of conversations involves vulnerability." 

But even though people may find it uncomfortable to reject someone, they may be making it worse by opting to ghost: "It also doesn't feel great to be the ghoster!" Battle points out. "Most people experience some amount of guilt for ghosting."

She adds, "I have coached people on how to communicate more directly rather than ghost. Most of the time it feels harder initially, but much better afterward compared to ghosting. I've even had cases where the other person has thanked my client for not ghosting them!"

It's a power play.

Sometimes a person may choose to ghost someone because they enjoy the sense of power it gives them over the situation, says Manly. This may especially be true if the "ghoster" feels like they were wronged by the other person or if they just think the other person is a jerk, loser, or otherwise unworthy of their time. It can also just be an attempt to feel powerful, at another person's expense.

They're concerned for their own safety.

Last but not least, both Manly and Battle note there's actually one valid reason for ghosting: fearing for one's safety. "If a person is afraid that they are in an emotionally or physically dangerous situation, ghosting is often the safest exit strategy," says Manly. A person may be concerned that the other person may respond poorly to rejection by lashing out, and so leaving quietly feels like the safer thing to do.

How long does it take before it's ghosting?

There's not a set amount of time it takes before it's considered ghosting, and it doesn't matter how long you've known the person. If they stop communicating with you completely without a word despite your follow-ups, it's ghosting.

As far as how long to wait before moving on and assuming the ghost is officially gone, it depends. "If it is someone you recently met, it can be two weeks before it's time to move on. If it's a longer relationship, it ranges up to a month," says Douglas. "It truly depends on the circumstances around what was occurring before the ghosting occurred. Sometimes people just need space, and it's up to your comfort level of the time frame you want to allow for space."

Do people ever come back after ghosting?

Yes, people can sometimes come back after ghosting. This is sometimes referred to as getting  zombied , i.e., someone first ghosts you but then reappears out of nowhere as if nothing happened.

Even if a person does come back after ghosting, it's important to get clarity as to why they disappeared and why they're suddenly coming back before you decide whether to let them back into your life. They may have just honestly been busy at the time of their disappearance and earnestly want to give it another go dating you, or they could just be bored and lonely and using you to fill the time—with all intentions of ghosting you again later.

Should I reach out to the person who ghosted me?

You absolutely can! If the person who ghosted you is someone you're legitimately interested in or whose disappearance has really hurt you, you can reach out to them to ask what's going on. They may respond and give you a good explanation for their behavior, and if they're genuinely interested in you, you may even be able to pick the relationship back up.

"If you ghosted because of a personal reason that you just didn't know how to address with the other person, you can try to open the conversation again and let them know what happened," says Battle. "Starting from a place of honesty and vulnerability could help reanimate a previously ghosted connection."

However, there's also a chance that you reach out to the person who ghosted you, and they continue to be unresponsive. If nothing else, that will tell you all you need to know about how that person really feels about you.

Is ghosting abuse?

"Ghosting can certainly be emotionally abusive in nature," Manly says. "Especially if the relationship was deeply connective or promises were made, the person who was ghosted can certainly suffer from significant anxiety and depression related to the ghosting incident."

Is ghosting ever OK?

Yes, ghosting is OK in situations where you're concerned about the other person lashing out at you for rejecting them. "In cases where people are jerks to you, cross your boundaries in some way, or display characteristics that feel unsafe for you to engage with them again, ghosting might be the best option," Battle says.

How to respond to ghosting.

How you respond to ghosting depends on what you want out of the situation and out of your relationship with this person.

If you're not interested in this person anymore, just leave it be and move on. You really don't need to say anything to them, and the sooner you can get them out of your head , the better.

If this is a person you are still interested in dating or having in your life, just reach out again one more time and ask what's going on. Be direct.

Here are some things you can say:

  • "Hey! Haven't heard from you in a while. Are you still down to hang out again?"
  • "Hey, stranger. I miss you! Everything OK?"
  • "Hey, are you still interested in getting to know each other? It's OK if not—just wanna know what's going on!"
  • "Hey! I haven't heard from you in a while. I've been enjoying hanging out and would love to get together again. Where's your head at?"
  • "Hi, I know you've been really busy lately, but can you let me know if everything's OK?"

How they respond will tell you everything you need to know. If they're still interested, they'll respond positively—maybe they'll apologize, maybe they'll have a legitimate explanation for why they've been unresponsive lately, and ideally they'll show some indication that they want to keep getting to know you. If they're not interested, this will be their opportunity to let you know. And if they don't respond again—well, that's them letting you know they're truly done.

The takeaway.

When in doubt, talk it out. If you think someone is ghosting you, reach out one more time and ask them directly about what's going on and whether they're still interested in pursuing things with you. If you don't hear from them, it's time to move on.

And remember: While rejection stings, ghosting is almost always much more about the ghost's issues than it is about issues with the person being ghosted. In fact, getting ghosted says essentially nothing about you.

"Having someone ghost you says infinitely more about them than it does about you," spiritual teacher Monica Berg writes at mbg . "You're getting a firsthand look at how this person, who just days ago was so marvelous, actually handles their emotions, your emotions, and difficult circumstances in general. 'Runs away at any sign of conflict' typically doesn't make anyone's list of dream qualities in a partner, and you got to see that clearly and upfront."

And if you're the one doing the ghosting? Unless there are safety concerns at play, please know there are much better ways to reject people . Be brave, be kind, and be upfront. Don't ghost. 

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Ghosting In Relationships: Everything You Need To Know

Anna Drescher

Mental Health Writer

BSc (Hons), Psychology, Goldsmiths University, MSc in Psychotherapy, University of Queensland

Anna Drescher is a freelance writer and solution-focused hypnotherapist, specializing in CBT and meditation. Using insights from her experience working as an NHS Assistant Clinical Psychologist and Recovery Officer, along with her Master's degree in Psychotherapy, she lends deep empathy and profound understanding to her mental health and relationships writing.

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BSc (Hons) Psychology, MRes, PhD, University of Manchester

Saul Mcleod, Ph.D., is a qualified psychology teacher with over 18 years experience of working in further and higher education. He has been published in peer-reviewed journals, including the Journal of Clinical Psychology.

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Associate Editor for Simply Psychology

BSc (Hons) Psychology, MSc Psychology of Education

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On This Page:

The term “ghosting” has become a well-known dating and social term in recent years. It refers to the practice of suddenly and abruptly cutting off all communication with someone, typically in the context of a romantic or interpersonal relationship.

“Ghosting” was first mentioned on Urban Dictionary in 2006, and it has since become a recognized term in popular culture.

In a 2014 survey of 1,o00 U.S adults by the Huffington Post on ghosting, around 13% of respondents reported being ghosted by someone they were dating. Another 2018 survey found that 72% of respondents had experienced ghosting.

Considering the prevalence of this behavior, discussing the effects of ghosting, understanding why people engage in this behavior, and knowing how to cope when you’ve been ghosted is important for anyone navigating the world of dating and relationships.

Ghosted on mobile phone on table with glass of wine and tissue, Ghosting to cut all communication without explanation, ending a relationship. Social media dating.

What Does It Mean to Ghost Someone?

To “ghost” someone means to abruptly cut off all communication with them, effectively disappearing from their life without explanation.

While this term is commonly used in the context of dating , ghosting can also occur between friends, family members, or colleagues.

Being ghosted can lead to significant emotional distress, including feelings of rejection, confusion, and self-doubt as it leaves the other person feeling rejected and misguided without any closure or explanation.

Signs That You Have Been Ghosted

Being ghosted can be a confusing and emotionally challenging experience.

The most obvious sign of being ghosted is when the person you were communicating with suddenly stops responding to your calls, texts, messages, or emails. They go from being responsive to completely silent with no explanation or reason for their sudden disappearance.

Even if you initiate contact multiple times, they don’t engage in conversation or make any effort to continue the relationship. Or, if you had plans to meet up or do something together, they will cancel without a valid reason.

Other early warning signs that hint at impending ghosting include:

  • They are still active on social media but are not responding to your messages.
  • They may unfollow you or remove you from their friends or contacts on social media.
  • When they do respond, their messages are often brief and vague.
  • You may get a gut feeling that something is wrong because of the sudden change in behavior.

Ghosting Example

Here is an example of a ghosting story from a 2020 Washington Post article :

“I had been dating a guy for almost two months. Everything seemed like it was going well — we had made plans to go out the following weekend. Then he texted me that he was in the emergency room and would need to cancel our date. Of course I was worried, so I texted and called him numerous times to see how he was doing, but he didn’t respond. Eleven days went by and I constantly went back-and-forth between worry, confusion and anger that he might be ghosting me.”

How Long With No Contact Is Considered Ghosting?

The duration of no contact that is considered ghosting can vary depending on the nature of the relationship and the prior communication patterns.

There’s no specific time frame that universally defines ghosting, as it can occur after just a few days of no contact or after longer periods.

It’s essential to remember that each relationship is unique, and what constitutes ghosting can differ from one situation to another. Ultimately, you should pay attention to any noted changes in behavior or communication patterns.

For example, if they typically respond immediately, a few days of no contact could indicate ghosting. However, if they usually take a several days to respond, a few days without a response might not mean you are being ghosted (they could just be a ‘bad texter’ ).

The key aspect of ghosting is the sudden and unexplained disappearance, leaving the other person in a state of confusion and uncertainty. If someone has stopped responding to your attempts at communication without providing any reason or closure, regardless of the specific duration of no contact, it may be considered ghosting.

What Does Ghosting Say About a Person?

When you have been ghosted, it is common to question yourself and wonder whether you did something to make them disappear. But, in most circumstances, ghosting primarily reflects the actions and choices of the person doing the ghosting rather than the person who is ghosted.

Ghosting may suggest that the person has difficulty with open and honest communication. They may be uncomfortable with confrontation, conflict, or vulnerable conversations, so they choose to avoid them altogether. This is particularly prevalent in individuals who have an avoidant attachment style .

Some people ghost simply because they lack empathy. They may not fully understand or care about the emotional impact of their actions on others.

In dating contexts, ghosting can indicate a fear of commitment or an unwillingness to invest in a relationship. Some may be hesitant to take the next step or they may be exploring other options.

While it can be hurtful and frustrating to be on the receiving end of ghosting, it’s also important to recognize that people may ghost for a variety of reasons, and one instance of ghosting may not provide a comprehensive picture of someone’s character.

How Does It Feel to Be Ghosted?

Being ghosted is often an emotionally challenging and distressing experience.

Ghosting often leaves individuals feeling hurt, rejected, and confused as they may struggle to understand why the other person suddenly stopped communicating without any explanation.

They may begin to question their self-worth and desirability, as they may interpret the ghosting as a rejection of who they are.

Being ghosted can also lead to frustration and anger. The lack of closure and unanswered questions can make people feel disrespected, mistreated, or taken for granted.

Additionally, the loss of a relationship, even if it was not deeply meaningful, can lead to feelings of sadness or grief. People may mourn the potential or the connection they thought they had.

If the person who ghosted was a close friend or partner, the sense of loss can be feel overwhelming and can cause intense emotional pain.

Emotional Stages of Ghosting: Surprise, Responsibility, and Anguish

The emotional stages of ghosting can be complex and challenging to navigate. While there is no one-size-fits-all experience, there are some common emotional stages that many people may go through when they realize they have been ghosted.

The initial reaction to being ghosted is often surprise or confusion as one suddenly realizes that the person they were communicating with has stopped responding or has disappeared from their life without explanation.

One participant commented, “The not knowing the reason was the thing that hurt me the most.” Another noted, “When such an event happens, one feels confused. You begin to ask many questions to which no or multiple answers are plausible.”

After the initial surprise, some individuals may start to internalize the situation and question whether they did something wrong. Victims spend a lot of time speculating on whether they said or did something to cause the ghosting, leading to feelings of self-blame or responsibility.

One participants said, “I’ve never been able to find an explanation for what happened, I thought about what faults I could have had.” Another stated, “Several times, I thought I had done something wrong without realizing it.”

As you come to terms with the fact that you’ve been ghosted, the emotional impact often intensifies, leading to feelings of anguish or emotional pain.

Participants commented:

“I felt very angry because I found his behavior absurd, unfair, and irrational.” “I felt very alone, devalued, desolated, and very sad, as if any hope for a better future was impossible.”

Personal Experiences: Emotional Impact and Reflections

Holmes (2022) conducted an analysis of young adults’ stories of being ghosted. These real-life experiences illustrate how different people may respond when they have been ghosted.

“At first I was pretty upset,” Emily said, “just because I didn’t know what I did wrong.”

Heather noted that being ghosted “made me second guess myself and doubt a lot of how I communicated with [the ghoster] and, you know, what I did wrong.”

“I see myself as very naive, first of all. I look back at it, and I’m like, you idiot.” She even recalled being angry with herself “for not figuring it out sooner and for actually believing what [the ghoster] had said.”
“I’ve never lost sleep over a guy before,” she said, “but this time, I was staying up late. When I was lying in bed, my mind was just like a hamster running in a wheel. I just could not stop thinking about it.”

Here are a couple more real-life accounts documented in a 2020 Washington Post article :

“[…]I was ghosted by a woman I had thought of as my best friend for six years, and that was more hurtful by far. When someone who has called you every day, professed undying friendship and sisterhood, supported you, advised you, defended you and included you in everything they did for years, suddenly locks you out of their orbit with no warning and no explanation, it’s easy to feel really misused.”
“We met through an online dating app in July 2017. Instant connection, lots of emails and texts. First date was at his house. Talked for hours, first kiss. Then he left to travel, which he did frequently. After a few perfunctory texts, he disappeared. I was a wreck for weeks, having never been ghosted before. I got over it, just by the passage of time.”

Long-Term Effects of Ghosting

Experiencing ghosting can have various long-term effects on an individual’s emotional and psychological well-being.

Some research has compared the effects of ghosting to those of social exclusion as both experiences involve the feeling of being rejected or excluded from a social connection. Humans are inherently social beings, and our brains are wired to seek social connection and belonging.

When we experience rejection or exclusion, whether through ghosting or other forms of social rejection, we often respond in similar ways.

Both ghosting and social exclusion can lead to feelings of sadness, loneliness, and even depression. This sense of being unwanted or unimportant can be deeply distressing.

Research has also found that being ghosted can negatively affect one’s self-esteem and self-worth. Many people report lower life satisfaction, feelings of helplessness, and loneliness. Some may begin to question their attractiveness, likability, or value in relationships.

Ghosting can also erode a person’s trust in others, particularly in future romantic relationships.

Participants in the analysis by Holmes (2022) reported: “Because of being ghosted, [they keep] their distance from potential partners and [are] more afraid that someone will leave ‘just like that.'” Others said they “try not to get serious too fast with anyone” and are “definitely less trusting and more suspicious.”

Interestingly, another study by Navarro et al. (2021) found that those who had previously been ghosted were more likely to ghost others in the future.

How to Respond to Ghosting

Responding to ghosting can be challenging, as it often involves dealing with a situation where communication has abruptly and unexpectedly ended.

Feeling like you are being ignored can be extremely frustrating and hurtful. Many people respond to this frustration by persistently attempting to reach out to the other person in the hope they will eventually respond.  

However, this is not the best way to respond to being ghosted as it will only exacerbate your sense of helplessness and shame.

Here are some steps and strategies you can consider when responding to ghosting:

Allow Yourself to Grieve

Allow yourself some time to process your emotions and reactions before taking any action. It’s natural to feel hurt, confused, or angry when you’ve been ghosted, and taking a step back can help you gain perspective.

Reflect on your feelings and the impact of the ghosting on your well-being. How has it affected you emotionally? Understanding your own emotions can guide your healing process.

You can also consider talking to friends, family, or a therapist about your experiences.

Once you have allowed yourself to grieve and voice your feelings, you should begin to move forward and let them go.

Let Them Go

Not responding is a form of response – they have chosen to respond with silence to let you know they are no longer interested or prefer not to communicate with you.

Being rejected in this way is a hard pill to swallow as it hurts your pride and self-worth.

But trying to force someone to respond when they clearly do not want to talk will not make you feel better – it will only make you feel more desperate and distressed.

Therefore, you must accept that the person who ghosted you may not ever provide the closure you seek.

If you feel like you have something left to say, you can consider sending a single, polite, and non-confrontational message to them. However, if they do not reply, you should not keep chasing them.

You should aim to move forward and focus on building healthy relationships with others who value and respect you.

Challenge Negative Thoughts

Try to avoid blaming yourself for the ghosting. Remind yourself that ghosting is primarily a reflection of the other person’s behavior and choices, not yours.

When you’ve been ghosted, it’s natural to want answers and to question what you might have done wrong. You may never know the reason for their behavior, but most of those reasons likely have nothing to do with you.

They could be dealing with their own issues, fears, or relationship challenges that led them to this decision.

Remind yourself that you are a valuable and worthy individual regardless of how someone else chose to end the relationship.

Instead of placing blame, focus on learning from the experience. Reflect on what you want in future relationships and how you can communicate your needs and expectations more effectively.

Avoid Over-Analyzing

When something happens that we cannot explain, it is normal for our minds to spiral and over-analyze every interaction and behavior in an attempt to reach some sort of clarity.

While seeking closure from the person who ghosted you is understandable, recognize that true closure often comes from within.

It can be challenging not to have clear answers or closure about why the person chose to disappear, but you must learn to accept the situation and embrace the uncertainty.

Not everything in life can be neatly explained or controlled. Instead, acknowledge that you may not get all the answers you seek and find a way to be okay with that lack of clarity.

Prioritize Healing and Self-Care

Prioritize self-care during this time. Engage in activities that bring you joy and relaxation, and take care of your physical and emotional well-being.

If you are feeling low and devalued, remind yourself of your strengths and positive traits. You could ask your friends and family what they love about you, or make a list yourself.

Reconnect with hobbies, interests, and activities that you enjoy. This can help you regain a sense of purpose and self-worth.

Should I Ask Them Why They Ghosted Me? Should I Ask the Ghoster for Closure?

Whether or not you should ask the person who ghosted you for an explanation or closure is a personal decision.

While asking for closure may provide you with some insight into the reasons behind the ghosting, there is no guarantee that the person who ghosted you will respond or provide the closure you seek. If the response is unsatisfactory or if they continue ignoring you, this can lead to further disappointment and emotional distress.

Additionally, seeking closure may extend the emotional process and delay your ability to heal and move forward.

If you decide to reach out, make sure to set realistic expectations and understand that you may not receive a response or the response you were hoping for.

Regardless of the response, be prepared to move on with or without closure. Closure often comes from within and through the process of accepting and processing the situation.

Should I Give the Ghoster a Chance?

Deciding whether to give the person who ghosted you a chance depends on various factors, including your own feelings, the nature of the relationship, and the circumstances surrounding the ghosting.

Before deciding to give the ghoster a chance, it’s essential to understand the reasons behind the ghosting. Was it a one-time occurrence related to personal issues or circumstances, or is it a pattern of behavior?

Evaluate whether the ghoster has taken steps to communicate with you, provide an explanation, or express remorse for their actions as open and honest communication is crucial for rebuilding trust.

Additionally, if ghosting is part of a pattern of unreliable or hurtful behavior, it’s important to consider whether this is a person you want in your life. Try reflecting on your past experiences with this person.

Have they consistently demonstrated care, respect, and consideration in the relationship, or have there been other issues? Do you believe that open communication and transparency can be reestablished in the relationship?

To illustrate, here is a personal experience :

“[…]After a few perfunctory texts, he disappeared. I was a wreck for weeks, having never been ghosted before. I got over it, just by the passage of time. Spring 2019, our paths cross again. I’m cynical, but he makes all the effort. He asks me out to dinner. He comes over to my house for wine a few days later. He suggests we have coffee Saturday mornings at my house, after his bicycle riding group is finished. He comes over to my house to cook me dinner. On a Friday night, about three months after we are reacquainted, he texts me a picture of himself presenting that week at a conference, from the plane, as he was coming home for the week. No text from him Saturday morning about our standing coffee date. I text him at noon. I text him later that day. By Sunday late morning, I’m in a panic, thinking that he’s been hit by a car on his Saturday morning bike ride. No response from him. By Monday, I sent my final text, saying that I had no idea where he was, if he was even still alive, but that I didn’t want to move forward until I was important enough to him for him to respond to me. Turns out, he was still alive, very much so. I later learned that his “roommate,” whom he described as his ex-girlfriend in the process of finding a new place to live, was NOT his ex.”

Rules for Texting Someone When They Ghosted You

Navigating communication with someone who has ghosted you can be tricky and emotionally charged.

Generally speaking, if someone has ghosted you, they likely do not want to hear from you or engage in further communication. 

Thus, it is often best to avoid reaching out and instead, seek closure within yourself.

However, if you think seeking clarity can help you make sense of the situation and move on more effectively, here are some guidelines to consider.

When you are sending them a message make sure you:

  • Allow some time to pass before reaching out
  • Keep your initial message calm, polite, and non-confrontational
  • Share your feelings honestly but without overwhelming the other person
  • Encourage open and honest communication by asking open-ended questions
  • Be mentally prepared that the person may choose not to respond

If they do not reply, you must respect this decision.

Avoid doing the following things when you send them a message:

  • Accusing, blaming, or using aggressive language
  • Issuing ultimatums or making demands
  • Rushing into things
  • Calling or texting incessantly

Some examples of texts you could send include:

  • “I hope you’re doing well. I wanted to talk to you about something that’s been on my mind. I felt a bit confused and hurt when our communication suddenly stopped. Can you share your perspective on why that happened?”
  • “I understand that life can get busy, and sometimes we lose touch. I just wanted you to know that I hold no hard feelings, and I’m open to catching up if you’d like.”
  • “I hope you’re okay. I’ve been trying to understand what happened between us, and I would appreciate it if you could give me some closure. It would mean a lot to me.”

What Should You Not Do When Responding to a Ghoster?

When responding to someone who has ghosted you, it’s important to avoid certain behaviors and actions that can be counterproductive.

Although the ghoster’s behavior was unkind and unfair, it’s important not to respond with anger, blame, or confrontation. Accusing the person of wrongdoing or being hostile can escalate the situation and reduce the likelihood of a constructive conversation.

  • Let out your anger
  • Beg for a response
  • Send a barrage of messages
  • Issue threats or ultimatums
  • Publicly shame or humiliate them
  • Engage in guilt-tripping

Instead, responding to a ghoster with understanding, respect, and emotional maturity will help you foster a constructive dialogue and navigate the situation more effectively.

How to Respond When the Ghoster Comes Back

Responding to a ghoster who comes back into your life is a decision that should be made carefully, considering your own feelings and what you want from the situation.

Take some time to reflect on how you feel about the person’s return. Are you open to reconnecting, or do you still have reservations and concerns about the past ghosting experience?

Also, pay attention to how the person responds to your communication. Are they apologetic, sincere, and willing to address the issues that led to the ghosting? Evaluate whether their response aligns with your expectations.

If you decide to respond, initiate an open and honest conversation. Express your feelings and concerns about the previous ghosting incident using “I” statements to convey your emotions without accusing or blaming.

Try to encourage the person to share their perspective and reasons for ghosting if they are willing to do so as understanding their viewpoint can provide valuable insight into the situation.

Ultimately, if it seems that both parties are on the same page regarding the nature of the relationship, communication, and boundaries, and you decide to give the person another chance, take things slow. Rebuilding trust and a healthy connection may require time and patience, and rushing into things may lead to future problems.

Most importantly, trust your instincts and prioritize your own happiness and well-being. If you feel that the reconnection is unhealthy or causing distress, it’s okay to disengage and move forward.

Julia Simkus edited this article.

Is Ghosting Ever Acceptable?

Ghosting is generally considered to be a behavior that lacks empathy and communication, and it can have negative emotional impacts on the person being ghosted. However, there are a few exceptions where ghosting could be understood or justified.

If someone genuinely feels that communicating with a person could lead to harm, then limiting or cutting off contact can be a valid choice. But in the majority of cases where safety isn’t a concern, open and honest communication is usually the best approach.

Do Ghosters Ever Come Back?

People who have ghosted someone in the past may decide to come back for a variety of reasons, depending on their individual circumstances and motivations.

Some of the reasons a ghoster might return include: – Having regrets or second thoughts – External motivations, such as advice, a favor, or information – Loneliness and a yearning for connection – Genuine desire to reconnect

Is Ghosting a Form of Manipulation?

Ghosting is often considered a form of passive or indirect communication, rather than outright manipulation. However, some aspects of ghosting can be perceived as manipulative depending on the circumstances and the motivations behind it

For example, if someone uses ghosting as a means of keeping the other person guessing or insecure, it can be seen as a form of emotional manipulation.

Additionally, ghosting can have a significant emotional impact on the person being ghosted, leading to feelings of rejection, confusion, and self-doubt. In this sense, it can be seen as manipulative because it can cause emotional distress.

Is Ghosting Always Narcissistic?

Ghosting is not always narcissistic. While ghosting can be a hurtful and inconsiderate way to end a relationship or communication, it does not necessarily indicate narcissistic behavior.

Nevertheless, research has found that those with Dark Triad traits (e.g., callousness, selfishness, manipulativeness) are more approving of ghosting as a strategy to end a relationship. Those who have high scores of narcissism and psychopathy are likely to use ghosting as a way to discard people and avoid commitment.  

That means, while not everyone who uses ghosting is narcissistic, people high in narcissism are more likely to ghost .

How Do You Respond to Being Ghosted by Your Employer?

Being ghosted by an employer can be a confusing and frustrating experience, especially if you were expecting communication regarding job-related matters.

In the initial stages, try to stay calm and patient. It’s possible that there are legitimate reasons for the lack of communication, such as internal processes or delays.

If you still do not hear, send a polite and professional follow-up message to your employer or the relevant contact within the organization. Express your understanding of their busy schedule and inquire about the status of the matter in question.

If your direct supervisor or manager is the one who has ghosted you, consider reaching out to the HR department or a higher-ranking supervisor to seek assistance or clarification.

While addressing the situation with your current employer, it may also be prudent to explore alternative employment opportunities or maintain connections with a professional network to ensure your career progression.

What is Soft Ghosting?

Soft ghosting refers to a behavior where one person gradually reduces their level of communication or interaction with another person without fully cutting off contact. Unlike traditional ghosting where all contact abruptly stops, soft ghosting involves a more gradual and subtle reduction in communication.

Bonos, L. (2020). We asked for your ghosting stories. Here they are — including one guy who can’t stop ghosting women. Retrieved from https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/2020/02/21/ghosting-stories-dating  

Holmes, K. (2022). “Something Would’ve Been Better Than Nothing”: An Analysis of Young Adults’ Stories of Being Ghosted.

Koessler, R.B., Kohut,T., & Campbell,L. (2019). Data and Analyses. Retrieved from https://osf.io/gfdzs/

Navarro, R., Larrañaga, E., Yubero, S., & Villora, B. (2020). Psychological correlates of ghosting and breadcrumbing experiences: A preliminary study among adults. International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health, 17(3). 

Navarro, R., Larrañaga, E., Yubero, S., & Villora, B. (2021). Individual, interpersonal and relationship factors associated with ghosting intention and behaviors in adult relationships: Examining the associations over and above being a recipient of ghosting. Telematics and Informatics , 57.

Pancani, L. & Mazzoni, D. & Aureli, N. & Riva, P. (2021). Ghosting and orbiting: An analysis of victims’ experiences. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 38.

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Ghosting Slang: Meaning, Origin, Sentence Examples

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(Verb) Ghosting is a word that describes the action of a person who disappears without a warning when in the early stages of a romantic relationship. A person ghosting another won’t reply or answer calls without giving an explanation.

Ghosting was first used back in the early 2000s. It became popular due to the rise of social media and dating apps where most of the ghosting happens.

Demographic (Who Uses This Word)

Today, people of all ages but especially Gen Z uses the term ghosting. It is one of the most popular slang of this generation and many relate to this word.

Ghosting Used in a Sentence

  • Example 1: When did he start ghosting you? I saw him back on the dating app where you met him.
  • Example 2: I have my fair share of ghosting experiences and I don’t want it to happen again.

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What Is Ghosting?

The noun ghost   has been around a very long time, since before 900, when Old English was spoken. Originally it referred to the soul of a dead person or a disembodied spirit, and this meaning is still in use. In the recent past, ghost and ghosting have expanded in meaning, and today this term is often evoked in relation to dating.

How do you know if you’ve been ghosted?

You are a victim of ghosting if you one day realize that the person you’ve been seeing for two months is no longer replying to your texts. The verb form is also widely used; you can date someone for a few months and then ghost . Dictionary.com defines ghosting as “the practice of suddenly ending all contact with a person without explanation, especially in a romantic relationship.”

With ghosting there is no break-up conversation, perhaps because the relationship was not serious enough to warrant a formal break-up or because confrontation was seen as too difficult or not worth the trouble. Whatever the reason, the act of ghosting effectively ends a relationship. This sense of ghosting is a logical metaphorical extension of the original sense since exes can have the quality of lingering long after they’ve exited a person’s life.

When did people start ghosting?

The “ending a relationship” sense of ghosting is relatively new to English, but how new? On November 23, 2007, an Urban Dictionary entry for this sense of ghost appeared: “To ghost: Cutting all ties with a girl. I’m totally ghosting Ania as of right now .” Before 2007, a few similar senses of ghosting and ghost pop up in Urban Dictionary, however, they aren’t in this specific context of breaking up without actually breaking up.

It’s likely that the spread of this particular sense of ghosting is linked to the increasing use of online dating apps. Though online dating has been around for over twenty years, Tinder entered the scene in late 2012, and became ubiquitous in 2013. Around that time the term ghosting really took off in mainstream media. By 2014 and 2015 major publications like New York Times , Huffington Post , and the Independent were writing about it.

This sense of ghosting might find its roots in the idiom get ghost , meaning “to leave immediately; to disappear,” which gained popularity in ‘90s hip-hop. The Right Rhymes shows examples of this expression referring to sexual encounters from as early as 1994. However, these lyrics seem to be specifically about one-night stands. Going even further back, the Oxford English Dictionary lists the phrases to ghost it and to ghost away meaning “to steal away like a ghost,” as dating from the 1800s. In this update, Dictionary.com also added a related sense of ghosting : “the act of leaving a social event or engagement suddenly without saying goodbye.”

These links seem viable, but the exact origins of the “ending a relationship” sense of ghosting remain unknown. This all adds to the mystery of the term, which any victim of ghosting can agree is appropriate.

Jane Solomon is a lexicographer based in Oakland, CA. She spends her days writing definitions and working on various projects for Dictionary.com. In the past, she’s worked with other dictionary publishers including Cambridge, HarperCollins, Oxford, and Scholastic, and she was a coauthor of “Among the New Words,” a quarterly article in the journal American Speech. She is also part of the Unicode Emoji Subcommittee, the group that decides what new emoji pop up on our devices. Jane blogs at  Lexical Items , and she is the author of the children’s book The Dictionary of Difficult Words .

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Definition of ghosting

Examples of ghosting in a sentence.

These examples are programmatically compiled from various online sources to illustrate current usage of the word 'ghosting.' Any opinions expressed in the examples do not represent those of Merriam-Webster or its editors. Send us feedback about these examples.

Word History

1919, in the meaning defined at sense 1

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“Ghosting.” Merriam-Webster.com Dictionary , Merriam-Webster, https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/ghosting. Accessed 4 Feb. 2024.

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"Ghosting" is a term that is commonly used in dating and social relationships to refer to the sudden and unexplained ending of communication or contact with someone.

What does ghosting mean?

When someone "ghosts" another person, they abruptly stop responding to messages , phone calls, or other forms of communication, and essentially disappear without any explanation. This can be hurtful or confusing for the person who has been "ghosted," as they may be left wondering what happened or what they did wrong.

The term "ghosting" has become more common in recent years, particularly with the rise of online dating and social media . While it can be seen as a form of rejection or avoidance, it is not always done with malicious intent and may be a result of personal or situational factors.

What are the negative effects of ghosting?

It is important to note that ghosting can have negative effects on mental health , particularly for the person who has been "ghosted." It is generally considered a disrespectful and immature way to end a relationship or communication with someone, and is not a recommended approach for resolving conflict or ending relationships in a healthy way.

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What does "ghosting" mean in online dating.

Ghosting can be one of the most distressing experiences in online dating. Here's why it happens.

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What is ghosting, how ghosting works, ghosting on dating apps & social media, ghosting in non-romantic relationships, expanding the word "ghosting".

Ghosting can be one of the most distressing experiences in online dating. Find out what it is, when it happens, and why dating apps and social media contribute to its rise.

Ghosting is the act of completely stopping all communication with someone without prior notice, typically with a romantic partner. The person ghosting will ignore texts, calls, and any other forms of reaching out, and will normally not give any explanation to the other person. While ghosting can happen in all types of relationships, it's most prominent in those that take place mostly online. Ghosting can happen at any stage of the online dating process, whether it's at the start of a relationship or several months in.

A large component of ghosting is ambiguity. While ghosting implies that a relationship has ended, there's none of the closure and communication that happens in a typical breakup. Therefore, a person that has been ghosted will be left wondering what exactly happened and might be left feeling hurt, confused, and distraught.

Ghosting has become a cultural phenomenon because of the rise of social media and dating apps, which has made the practice very common among young people. A survey conducted in 2016 found that 80% of a sample size of 800 millennials have been ghosted at some point.

Ghosting normally follows a predictable pattern. First, the person will completely cut off contact. This means that they stop responding to any messages, calls, and texts. This could mean that they completely ignore any messages that are received and will no longer open them. This will normally come with no warning and may have no apparent cause or trigger. It can happen very soon after a previous conversation.

Next, the person may remove any links on social media apps. This includes unfriending them on platforms like Instagram and Twitter, unmatching them from dating apps, and blocking them on messaging apps like WhatsApp and Viber.

In other words: To ghost someone, just stop responding to them and ignore them. If this has happened to you, you've been ghosted.

A big cause of the rise of ghosting is the prominence of dating apps. These apps have made relationships much more anonymous and temporary than before. It's now widespread and easy to enter into and exit out of people's lives, and many have become desensitized to the phenomenon. Since users on dating apps are likely talking to multiple users at a time, it's possible that they don't actually hold any strong feelings about any particular user.

These apps have also reduced the possible repercussions of ghosting others, especially if two people have never actually met each other in person or have only spent a small amount of time together. There are very few of the social problems that come with actually cutting off a relationship.

Another big part of the practice is the ease by which people can disconnect on social networks and messaging apps, which are the primary forms of communication nowadays. Blocking someone on a platform like Instagram or unmatching someone on Tinder takes just a few clicks. Most dating apps like Tinder and Bumble have no way for someone to contact a previous match once they've been unmatched, which makes ghosting from these apps very easy.

Related: How to Block Someone on Instagram

Ghosting doesn't just happen in online dating. It can also happen in plenty of other contexts, including friendships and familial or professional relationships. While the reasons for ghosting in these kinds of relationships might be completely different, the behavior is the same. As long as it involves someone completely cutting off correspondence without warning and ignoring all future attempts to reach out, it can be considered ghosting.

An example of this happening in a professional relationship is if a partner you were supposed to work on a project with suddenly stops responding to your emails and messages completely. This is especially common when the subject of payment comes into question. Since communication is vital to work relationships, this behavior can tarnish someone's reputation in the professional world.

Related: How to Block Emails from Specific Senders in Gmail

In recent years, the definition of the term "ghosting" has begun to expand out of its original meaning. Now, it can mean any cut-off in communication, even from people whom you don't actually know personally. For example, if a famous celebrity figure has seemingly stopped engaging with the general public, fans might say that the celebrity is "ghosting" them.

The word is now also used to describe relatively minor infractions, such as taking too long to respond, leaving someone's message on "read," or forgetting to reply to someone for an extended period of time. In this context, ghosting doesn't actually mean to end a relationship. If someone you still have a relationship with has told you to stop ghosting them, they may just want you to respond to messages a little bit faster.

Of course, completely outside of relationships, ghosting can also refer to visual glitches on computer monitors .

Robert T Muller Ph.D.

Unapologetically Gone: The Lasting Harm of Ghosting

Threatening the target's self-esteem, and future relationships..

Updated November 12, 2023 | Reviewed by Davia Sills

  • What Is Ghosting?
  • Find a therapist near me
  • Online dating has swept the globe and instituted many changes in social trends, such as ghosting.
  • Ghosting is thought to be the result of a reduced sense of felt social responsibility.
  • Ghosting is associated with negative implications for future relationships, such as pessimism.

Aleshyn Andrei/Shutterstock

This post was co-authored by Daniel Sanchez Morales and Robert T. Muller, Ph.D.

Social media and dating apps have revolutionized the way we establish relationships with others, offering accessibility and flexibility that have shifted our ideas about maintaining connections. Unlike other relationships, online dating provides a platform to connect to people outside of direct personal networks, reducing a sense of social responsibility and making it easier to end communication with someone.

Leah LeFebvre, an associate professor at the University of Alabama, provides her perspective on BuzzFeed about “ ghosting .” 1 It's an increasingly occurring phenomenon defined in pop culture as a sudden cease in communication between two people. She notes, “Ghosting itself is not just an action, but also an outcome.”

Age and dating trends are relevant to ghosting. LeFebvre’s research has shown that emerging adults engage in ghosting the most. People in this age group are exploring various aspects of their lives related to dating and establishing connections, which include navigating sexual orientation , education , social network , and family connections, factors that are weighed when making the decision to ghost someone.

LeFebvre’s research focuses on the impact of ghosting, including its associated mental health challenges. She expands on its definition by stating that communication typically ceases in an attempt to end the relationship and that it can happen through one or more channels. It is often unilateral: There is an initiator (“ghoster”) and a non-initiator (“ghostee”).

Thus, it is understood through cause-and-effect, with one person prompting it. Simultaneous ghosting can also happen, in which case, there is typically no ghostee.

LeFebvre explains that there can be multiple factors that motivate an initiator to ghost, and at times, it may be unintentional.

Commonly, initiators engage in ghosting due to convenience. The initiator may ghost to avoid confrontation or to stop investing their time when they are not interested in the relationship. But LeFebvre’s research shows that reasons such as personal safety and preservation of mental health also play a role in motivating a ghoster to end communication with the ghostee.

Ghostees are left trying to understand the motives. LeFebvre says speculation on the possible involvement of an alternative partner is common, whether a former, current, or even future partner. Other worries include concerns about incompatibility, lack of interest in sex and intimacy , or individual flaws.

Aside from the rumination that commonly follows the experience of being ghosted, research has highlighted additional harms to psychological well-being, including feelings of sadness and pain, as well as experiencing a felt sense of threat over one's self-esteem , control, and belonging.

Further, ghosting is associated with negative implications for future relationships, such as pessimism and an avoidance of dating altogether.

Coping can be difficult. For those who have been ghosted, LeFebvre suggests that acknowledging that ghosting happens to other people and may have little to do with who you are as an individual can reduce the guilt or shame the ghostee may have about the situation or what happened.

There can be space to move on, and ghostees can proceed to heal in both the short and long term. Physical activity or hanging out with friends, for instance, can promote positive relationships that are immediately beneficial.

Facebook image: BaLL LunLa/Shutterstock

[1] R. Ishak, “People are sharing why they decided to ghost their friends, and it’s completely heartbreaking,” BuzzFeed , 05-Dec-2021. [Online]. Available: https://www.buzzfeed.com/ravenishak/ghosting-a-friend . [Accessed: 15-Sep-2023]

Robert T Muller Ph.D.

Robert T. Muller, Ph.D. , is a professor of psychology at York University, and the author of the book Trauma and the Avoidant Client .

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What Does "Ghost" Mean in Text? A Comprehensive Guide to the Ghosting Phenomenon

Ghosting – the act of suddenly cutting off all communication with someone without explanation – has become an increasingly prevalent behavior in the digital age. As technology facilitates more impersonal connections, ghosting is affecting friendships, romantic relationships, and even professional networks.

In this comprehensive guide, I‘ll unpack everything you need to know about ghosting: where it came from, why people do it, the psychology behind it, and most importantly – how to deal with it. Having gone through my fair share of ghosting experiences, I aim to provide constructive insights both as a technology enthusiast and human being trying to navigate the modern dating landscape.

Let‘s start by defining this elusive phenomenon…

What Exactly is Ghosting?

Ghosting refers to completely cutting off communication with someone unexpectedly and without any closure. It‘s like you‘re living while they suddenly become a ghost – hence the term.

Ghosting can look like:

  • Stopping all texts and calls without warning
  • Excusing yourself from previously planned meetings/dates and going MIA
  • Blocking or unfollowing someone on social media and apps
  • Pretending the person never existed in your life

The rise of digital communication over face-to-face interaction has made ghosting increasingly common. Someone may seem very interested and engaged only to disappear the next day.

The term “ghosting” itself only emerged in the last 15 years or so. It was coined around 2006-2008 and spread on early internet forums discussing dating behaviors.

According to Google Trends data, searches for “ghosting” rose sharply in 2015 and continue to trend upwards:

ghosting definition slang

So ghosting is not completely new – people have certainly engaged in the behavior of avoidance before. But the advent of digital communication has almost normalized it as a way to end relationships.

Why Do People Ghost?

There are a few primary motivations that typically lead someone to ghost another person:

Lack of Interest

The most common reason – they simply weren’t feeling excited or invested in pursuing communication further. Rather than politely conveying this however, they disappear.

This is often seen in online dating – chatting with someone for a bit only to lose interest and stop replying.

Avoiding Confrontation

Many ghosters disappear to sidestep an uncomfortable conversation. They may foresee the other person getting angry, lashing out, or demanding explanations around a breakup. By ghosting, they avoid this confrontation entirely.

For some ghosters, it comes down to simply lacking the effort to have the talk and gain closure. They may rationalize “this person isn’t worth my time and energy.”

Teaching a Lesson

In rarer cases, ghosting is used to punish the other person or deliberately make them feel bad. This ties into passive aggression and toxic power dynamics.

Uncertainty

Some ghosters themselves can’t even articulate exactly why they lost interest. So rather than communicating these ambiguous feelings, they withdraw entirely.

How Prevalent is Ghosting Anyway?

While hard statistics are scarce, surveys suggest ghosting is surprisingly common:

  • According to a 2019 YouGov poll, 25% of Americans admit to ghosting someone.
  • In a 2017 survey by 10Senses dating service, 78% of women and 67% of men reported being ghosted.
  • Per a 2018 poll by Insider, 23% of respondents ghosted someone after just 1-3 dates.

So while no one is immune, millennials seem especially likely to have experienced ghosting in modern dating.

Ghosting also happens platonically – a friend you regularly hung out with suddenly stops returning your texts. Or professionally, a business contact cuts off communication inexplicably.

Bottom line – ghosting has become a normalized way to end all types of relationships, romantic or not.

Different Ghosting Styles and Approaches

While the core concept is consistent, there are variations in how people approach ghosting:

Full ghost – All communication stops suddenly across all platforms. Previously made plans are cancelled. Extreme and unambiguous.

The slow fade – Replying less frequently over time rather than going cold turkey. Creating distance more gradually.

“Caspering” – Continuing to view social media posts without direct interaction. Maintaining one-sided digital “presence” while communication stops.

Orbiting – Periodically engaging then disappearing again, creating sporadic ambiguity.

Zombie-ing – Ghosting then suddenly reappearing as if nothing happened, often months/years later.

Haunting – Following social media closely to “monitor” the ghosted party after disappearing.

Ghosting styles reveal how deeply digital communication has influenced our relationships – for better or worse.

How Does it Feel to Be Ghosted?

Being on the receiving end of ghosting can be deeply painful and confusing:

You’re left feeling insignificant – like you suddenly don’t matter anymore.

It triggers self-blame – you start questioning what you may have done wrong.

There’s often no closure – you have no idea why things ended.

You feel disrespected – like your time/efforts haven’t been valued.

Studies show ghosting takes a psychological toll:

In a 2019 study, subjects who imagined being ghosted reported lower self-esteem and more negative emotions than those imagining a mutual breakup.

Being ghosted has been associated with elevated social anxiety for months afterwards.

Frequent ghosting victims report longer-term distress , anger issues , and symptoms of depression .

Overall, most psychologists agree ghosting leaves people hurt and hinders emotional healing. The lack of closure stings much more than a respectful goodbye.

So Is Ghosting Ever Okay?

Views differ on whether ghosting can ever be justified. In certain contexts, some argue disappearing without a trace causes minimal harm:

After just 1-2 dates with someone you barely know.

Ending a short, casual fling with no assumed longevity.

Breaking things off in an unhealthy/abusive relationship.

When you‘ve made your lack of interest clear but the other person won‘t accept it.

However, in my opinion, ghosting should be an absolute last resort. The few situations above represent exceptions, not the rule.

If you value relationships – romantic or otherwise – ghosting almost never feels good to be on the receiving end of.

We owe each other base levels of mutual respect and closure as human beings, even if difficult.

Finding a compassionate way to end things will almost always be worth it for both parties in the end.

How to Cope if You’ve Been Ghosted

If someone ghosts you, here are some healthy ways to process it:

Recognize it‘s not your fault – ghosters likely have unrelated personal issues driving their behavior. Don‘t internalize blame.

Avoid lashing out – confronting the ghoster angrily will just validate their desire to avoid communicating with you. Kill them with kindness.

Lean on friends/family for support – reconnect with people who truly care about you. Share your feelings to process the experience.

Reflect constructively – think about any lessons learned for future relationships. How to identify red flags sooner?

Focus inward – cultivate self-love through activities like journaling, exercising, getting immersed in hobbies.

Give it time – the hurt fades eventually. Letting go frees you up for relationships that nurture you.

Getting ghosted is always tough initially. But down the road it often represents a relationship you‘re better off without.

Can You Confront Ghosting Constructively?

If you feel compelled to reach out to a ghoster, proceed thoughtfully. Gauge if the relationship is worth salvaging first. Then approach it by:

Leading with empathy – don‘t attack or criticize them.

Communicating feelings without accusations – "I feel hurt and confused" not "You‘re so selfish!"

Giving them an opportunity to explain if they wish.

Discussing how to communicate more effectively going forward.

Parting on good terms either way.

With compassion and patience, it’s sometimes possible to reconnect and gain understanding after ghosting. But the other person may still not provide the closure you desire – accepting this allows you to move forward.

Healthier Alternatives to Ghosting

When ending any relationship, we owe it to each other to communicate as politely and directly as possible.

Here are principles for concluding relationships in a more mature, compassionate way:

Have an honest conversation in person if possible – over video chat if not.

Give them the courtesy of your time and attention .

Listen openly to their thoughts and feelings.

Explain your reasons respectfully – focus on your needs rather than placing blame.

Thank them for the meaningful time spent together.

Leave the door open to future communication if desired.

Follow up supportively after some time has passed.

Does having this talk require bravery? Absolutely. But it demonstrates emotional intelligence and preserves mutual dignity.

The Culture Around Ghosting

To fully understand ghosting, we need to explore the cultural landscape enabling the behavior.

Several societal factors contribute to its normalization:

1. Passive Aggression

Conflict-avoidant cultures breed indirect expressions like ghosting. We‘re taught overt confrontation is impolite or dangerous.

2. Avoidance of Hard Conversations

We don‘t develop skills to earnestly communicate difficult emotions and truths. Ghosting allows escaping this discomfort.

3. Dehumanizing Aspects of Online Dating

Swiping through countless profiles on apps strips away empathy; ghosting becomes collateral damage.

4. Instant Gratification Mindsets

Ghosting provides an "easy way out" aligned with convenience-centric, disposable consumption.

5. Validation Through Quantity

Collecting social media followers/matches is prioritized over nurturing depth in a few connections.

6. Celebrity Gossip Culture

Public obsession over the intimate lives of famous people desensitizes our views of ghosting.

Until we reframe cultural attitudes around compassion and depth in relationships, ghosting will persist – even as it violates our sense of humanity.

Ghosting Through Generational Lenses

Views on ghosting diverge significantly across generations:

Baby Boomers tend to consider it clearly disrespectful. Direct closure is valued.

Gen X takes a middle ground – circumstances dictate if it’s acceptable or not.

Millennials and Gen Z see it as the norm, although still frustrating when on the receiving end.

Younger generations are generally more desensitized, as ghosting aligns with disconnected digital lifestyles. But the pain it can cause remains universally understood.

Ghosting in Minority Communities

Marginalized demographics face distinct challenges around ghosting:

Cultural stigma creates barriers to discussing ghosting openly.

Being ghosted by white partners peddling racial stereotypes of hypersexuality.

LGBTQ+ Community

Higher risk of emotional/physical harm if rejected openly.

Internalized shame over sexual identity contributing to avoidance.

Neurodiverse Individuals

Social anxiety exacerbating ghosting behaviors.

Being ghosted due to stigma around mental health disorders.

Dispersed Cultural Groups

  • Lack of family/friend support systems to help cope with ghosting.

Unfortunately, marginalized communities are often more vulnerable to ghosting while also having fewer resources to build resilience against it. Supporting each other is vital.

Innovative Approaches to Overcome Ghosting

Creative solutions demonstrate how we might stem the ghosting epidemic:

Automated "no ghosting" contracts – legal apps generating mutual agreements to communicate closure in relationships.

Digital closure certificates – online platforms providing confirmed documentation when relationships end.

Ghosting helplines/hotlines – professional counseling and emotional support.

"Anti-ghosting" social networks – online communities to call out ghosters anonymously or report experiences.

Healthy communication workshops – courses teaching interpersonal skills to prevent ghosting.

"Consciously uncoupling" – structured mediation guiding compassionate closure of relationships.

While just concepts now, human-centric innovations like these could promote accountability and emotional honesty in how we connect.

Ghosting Case Studies from Real Life

Here are two first-hand ghosting experiences from my own life:

The Six-Month Relationship

Mark and I met through a dating app during the pandemic and quickly became inseparable, spending almost every day together. We never had a single fight. But after about six months, he suddenly stopped responding to my texts and disappeared from my life overnight.

I was completely blindsided and devastated. In retrospect, I realized Mark feared true intimacy and ran away when the relationship deepened. But his abrupt exit left me with no closure.

The Post-College Friend Ghost

My friend Hannah was my closest confidante in college but we drifted apart afterwards since she moved across the country. One weekend when I was visiting her city, she enthusiastically agreed to meet up only to go radio silent the day of.

I was hurt at first but came to accept friendships naturally change after college as people follow different paths. I still cherish our memories together.

Painful as they felt, these experiences taught me that sudden loss, while always hard, can catalyze growth. And that true connections find a way to endure across time and distance.

In Closing…

Ghosting remains a complicated phenomenon – and in many ways a reflection of our cultural moment.

By embracing courageous vulnerability and compassion, may we shift away from ghosting toward more authentic closure in all relationships. The rewards of human connection are well worth it.

As always, I appreciate you taking the time to read my perspectives on this topic – one close to my heart both professionally and personally. Please feel free to reach out with your own stories or insights on ghosting.

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What Does Ghosted Mean? – Meaning, Uses and More

ghosting definition slang

What Does Ghosted Mean?

The term ghosted is slang that refers to when someone abruptly ends all communication without any explanation, leaving the other person feeling abandoned. This can occur in various situations, including social gatherings and relationships. For example, if you host a birthday party and one of your friends leaves without saying goodbye, you have been ghosted. It can also happen in romantic relationships, where one person disappears without a trace because they are too anxious or immature to break up. While females are often the ones who experience ghosting in relationships, males can also go through this. The term originated from the concept of a ghost, something that appears to be present but is actually not there. Ghosting can be seen as a form of the silent treatment, causing emotional pain to the person who is ghosted. It is a behavior that goes beyond digital communication and is connected to our perception of the world. Here are some examples of how to use the term ghosted :

  • “I thought things were going great between him and me, but he ghosted me… He won’t respond to my messages or DMs.”
  • “Hey man, how’s Michelle? I don’t know, she completely ghosted me.”
  • “A: So how’s it going with Chad? B: Not so great. He’s not replying to me or answering my calls. A: Sounds like you got ghosted .”
  • “I had been sleeping with Todd for about a year and a half before he suddenly ghosted me. Even a ‘Fuck You’ would have been better.”
  • “I can’t believe she agreed to go on a date with me and then just ghosted me. It’s so frustrating!”

It’s important to recognize that being ghosted can be painful and emotionally distressing for the person who is left without an explanation. It is a behavior that can cause confusion and feelings of abandonment.

What Does Ghosted Mean From a Girl?

When a girl uses the term ghosted , it typically means the same thing as when anyone else uses it. Ghosting refers to abruptly ending all communication without any explanation. However, girls may have their own unique experiences and perspectives when it comes to being ghosted.

Here are some key points to consider:

  • Specific meaning from a girl : When a girl says she has been ghosted, it means that someone she was talking to or dating suddenly stopped responding or disappeared without any explanation. It can happen in various situations, including friendships and romantic relationships.
  • How girls use it : Girls may use the term ghosted to describe their experiences of being ignored or abandoned by someone they were interested in or had a connection with. They may use it to express frustration, confusion, or hurt feelings.
  • How to reply : If a girl tells you she has been ghosted, it’s important to be understanding and supportive. You can offer a listening ear and validate her feelings. Avoid minimizing her experience or telling her to just move on.

It’s worth noting that while ghosting is often associated with romantic relationships, it can happen in any type of relationship. Girls may also use ghosting as a way to end a friendship or avoid confrontation.

If you find yourself in a situation where you have ghosted someone and want to make amends, it’s important to take responsibility for your actions. Apologize sincerely and explain your reasons for ghosting, if appropriate. However, keep in mind that not everyone may be open to reconciliation, and it’s important to respect their boundaries.

In conclusion, while there may not be a specific meaning of ghosting from a girl’s perspective, girls can experience ghosting in various relationships and may have their own unique reactions and ways of using the term. It’s important to be understanding and supportive when someone shares their experience of being ghosted.

  • Girl A: Ugh, I can’t believe he ghosted me after our date.
  • Girl B: I know, right? Being ghosted sucks. You deserve better!
  • Girl: I thought we had a connection, but he just ghosted me out of nowhere.
  • Friend: That’s so unfair! You don’t deserve to be treated like that.
  • Girl A: I’ve been texting him for days and he hasn’t replied once.
  • Girl B: Seriously? He totally ghosted you. What a jerk!
  • Girl: We were talking every day and then he suddenly stopped responding.
  • Friend: Oh no, you got ghosted . Don’t worry, there are plenty of better guys out there.
  • Girl A: I tried reaching out to her, but she never replied.
  • Girl B: Sounds like she ghosted you. It’s her loss, you’re an amazing friend!

What Does Ghosted Mean From a Guy?

When a guy uses the term ghosted , it generally means the same thing as when anyone else uses it. Ghosting refers to abruptly ending all communication without any explanation. However, guys may have their own unique experiences and perspectives when it comes to being ghosted.

  • Specific meaning from a guy : When a guy says he has been ghosted, it means that someone he was talking to or dating suddenly stopped responding or disappeared without any explanation. It can happen in various situations, including friendships and romantic relationships.
  • How guys use it : Guys may use the term ghosted to describe their experiences of being ignored or abandoned by someone they were interested in or had a connection with. They may use it to express frustration, confusion, or hurt feelings.
  • How to reply : If a guy tells you he has been ghosted, it’s important to be understanding and supportive. Offer a listening ear and validate his feelings. Avoid minimizing his experience or telling him to just move on.

While the general meaning of ghosting is the same for both guys and girls, there may be some differences in how guys perceive and react to being ghosted compared to girls. Some guys may be more inclined to brush it off and move on, while others may feel deeply hurt or confused by the experience. It’s important to approach each individual’s experience with empathy and understanding.

In conclusion, while there may not be a specific meaning of ghosting from a guy’s perspective, guys can experience ghosting in various relationships and may have their own unique reactions and ways of using the term. It’s important to be understanding and supportive when someone shares their experience of being ghosted, regardless of their gender.

  • Guy 1: Dude, I was talking to this girl for weeks and then she just stopped responding out of nowhere.
  • Guy 2: Ah man, you got ghosted . It’s the worst feeling when someone just disappears like that.
  • Guy 1: So I went on a couple of dates with this girl and everything seemed great, but now she won’t return my calls or texts.
  • Guy 2: Sounds like you’ve been ghosted , my friend. It happens to the best of us.
  • Guy 1: I was really into this girl I met at a party, but she hasn’t reached out to me since.
  • Guy 2: Sorry to break it to you, but you’ve been ghosted . It’s tough, but you’ll find someone better.
  • Guy 1: I thought things were going well with this girl I met online, but she suddenly disappeared.
  • Guy 2: Ah, the classic ghosting move. It’s frustrating, but don’t let it get you down.
  • Guy: Bro, remember that girl I was talking to? Well, she completely ghosted me. No explanation or anything.
  • Friend: Damn, that sucks. Some people just can’t handle confrontation. Don’t worry, you’ll find someone better who won’t ghost you like that.

What Does Ghosted Mean Sexually?

Yes, ghosted does not have a sexual or NSFW meaning. It refers to when someone abruptly ends all communication without any explanation, leaving the other person feeling abandoned. It can occur in various situations, including social gatherings and relationships.

Origin of Ghosted

The origins of the word/phrase “ghosted” are not clear. It is possible that the term “ghosted” was derived from the concept of a ghost, something that appears to be present but is actually not there. This aligns with the meaning of the term, which refers to someone abruptly ending all communication without any explanation, leaving the other person feeling abandoned. However, without further evidence or historical information, it is difficult to determine the exact origins of the word/phrase “ghosted” or if it was a popular typo that became popularized.

Frequently Asked Questions

Slangs similar to ghosted.

The terms silent treatment, disappearing act, abandonment, specter, and emotional distress are similar to “ghosted” because they all involve abruptly ending communication without explanation, leaving the other person feeling abandoned and causing emotional distress. These terms describe the act of someone disappearing or cutting off communication, similar to the concept of “ghosting.”

Is Ghosted A Bad Word?

No, “ghosted” is not a bad word or a vulgar word. It refers to the act of someone abruptly cutting off all communication without explanation. While being ghosted can be hurtful and frustrating, the word itself is not inherently offensive or vulgar.

Is Ghosted a Typo or Misspelling?

The term “ghosted” is not a misspelling or typo. It is a slang term that refers to when someone abruptly ends all communication without any explanation, leaving the other person feeling abandoned.

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What does it mean?

Disappearing without a farewell

When someone suddenly disappears without any warning or explanation, it’s called ghosting . It’s as if they’ve turned into a ghost, gone without a trace. This term is used in different contexts, from social events to romantic relationships.

Consider you’re at a party and someone decides to leave without telling anyone. That’s ghosting. They just wanted to take off, without the fuss of saying goodbye to everyone. This is also known as pulling a French exit or an Irish goodbye .

But ghosting isn’t limited to social gatherings. It’s a term that’s often used in the dating world. When one person abruptly cuts off all contact with the other, that’s also ghosting. They stop answering calls, texts, or emails, leaving the other person to figure out what happened.

People usually ghost in romantic relationships because they’re either scared of confrontation or just plain lazy. It’s easier for them to disappear than to have a difficult conversation or write a breakup letter. It’s a tactic often used by folks who struggle with communication and commitment. But let’s be clear, both men and women can ghost .

Though ghosting may seem convenient for the one doing it, it can be incredibly frustrating for the one on the receiving end. So, it’s a good idea to avoid doing this if you don’t want to leave a trail of upset exes behind. Ghosting isn’t a kind or respectful way to end things.

Example for using ‘Ghosting’ in a conversation

Hey, did you hear from Mike? We were supposed to meet up for lunch today.

No, I haven’t heard anything. He’s totally ghosting you.

What? But we made plans yesterday. That’s so rude!

I know, right? It’s like he vanished into thin air without a word.

Related Slang Words You Might Be Interested In

On this page, we explain what Ghosting means. We also show you how to use it with some examples. It’s a small part of the big world of slang, and now you know a bit more about it.

If you find any inaccuracy in the meaning/explanation, please do not hesitate to let us know . Let's make the web better for everyone - one slang at a time. 🙂

What does Ghosting mean?

Ghosting

Other definitions of Ghosting:

  • Slang for the act of watching an online streamer who you are currently playing against in a video game. Most often in strategy games, this allows asymmetrical knowledge which can lead to an advantage. This is bad sportsmanship.
  • Cutting off all communication with someone via online platforms or texts. The name comes from how the person appears to have died to the other person.
  • Disappearing or cancelling plans so suddenly, that it would make sense that somebody has died.
  • Rarely, this can refer to the act of pooping so quickly and with such force, that the fecal matter disappears down the toilet before flushing occurs.

All of our slang term and phrase definitions are made possible by our wonderful visitors. If you know of another definition of Ghosting that should be included here, please let us know .

How to use the term Ghosting :

Are you ghosting me? I see that you're active online; you must be ignoring me.

There's no way this player should have anticipated my move. They're ghosting my stream.

I've been ghosted by so many people from this app. I think they're ghosting me after I tell them about my love of uncooked hotdogs.

I'm telling you I didn't flushing. It must have been ghosting.

Video related to Ghosting

References:

What psychologists can tell you about ghosting | youtube.

  • A Miscellaneous that mentions "Ghosting."

A SciShow Psych episode about the deeper meanings behind ghosting and the types of people who might ghost someone.

Hosted by Brit Garner.

  • Check it Out

More slang terms:

SEXE

Quick Question For You

IOTTMCO

Intuitively Obvious To The Most Casual Observer

FTMFW

For The Mother Fucking Win

Submit a new or better definition for Ghosting

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We hope you have found this useful. If you have any additional definitions of Ghosting that should be on this list, or know of any slang terms that we haven't already published, click here to let us know!

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  • 1. Leaving without saying goodbye
  • 2. Observing an opponent's gameplay

Leaving without saying goodbye

Ghosting is when a person vanishes without saying goodbye. The term typically refers to when a person leaves a social gathering without saying goodbye or when someone cuts off contact, usually with a romantic partner, without warning.

Regarding ghosting at a gathering, people who ghost don't want to go through the drawn-out process of saying their farewells to others when all they want to do is bounce . People may also refer to ghosting as the French exit or Irish goodbye .

Ghosting in dating

Ghosting is not only limited to the context of leaving social gatherings. It is also used in dating when a person abruptly stops contact with another person. For example, they may stop answering their SO 's phone calls, texts, or emails without giving a reason, waiting for them to take the hint as they vanish like a ghost without a trace.

Ghosting in romantic relationships is employed by people who are afraid of conflict or lazy. Instead of breaking up with someone face-to-face, over the phone, or in a letter, people find it much more convenient to text or email the person. Men who are bad at communication and commitment are the most common ghosters, but women may also ghost.

While ghosting a person to break up with them is convenient for the one doing the breaking up, it is incredibly frustrating for the person they are breaking up with. So, it is wise to avoid ghosting if you don't want to leave a trail of bitter exes.

Iliza is good at ghosting

Related Slang

Observing an opponent's gameplay.

Gamers use ghosting to describe the act of a player observing an opponent's gameplay, usually via a Twitch stream . Watching the opponent's gameplay gives the ghoster access to additional, usually-hidden information.

For example, CCG players may ghost an opponent to learn what cards are in the opponent's hand. Or, an FPS player might ghost an opponent to learn that opponent's location, and sneak in for a surprise kill.

Is ghosting cheating?

Most gamers consider ghosting to be cheating. However, because it is difficult to prove a player is ghosting, most games do not explicitly ban the practice. Additionally, other players argue that ghosting is a legitimate tactic. After all, no one is forcing streamers to stream their gameplay.

What else might ghosting mean in gaming?

More rarely, gamers may use ghosting to refer to "ghost images" appearing on their monitors. These afterimages are usually caused by a low screen refresh rate or high response time. However, this definition of ghosting has largely been supplanted by the more modern, streaming-related definition.

Ghosting definition by Slang.net

This page explains what the slang term "Ghosting" means. The various definitions, examples, and related terms listed above have been written and compiled by the Slang.net team.

We are constantly updating our database with new slang terms, acronyms, and abbreviations. If you would like to suggest a term or an update to an existing one, please let us know !

ghosting definition slang

IMAGES

  1. What Does Ghosting Mean? And How To Deal With It

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  3. Ghosting Someone: Everything You Need To Know (2023)

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  4. Ghosted Meaning: What Does the Interesting Term "Ghosted" Mean? • 7ESL

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  5. Ghosting » What does Ghosting mean? » Slang.org

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  6. How Ghosting Someone Affects Them

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VIDEO

  1. AMERICAN SLANG

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COMMENTS

  1. Ghosting: What It Means and How to Respond

    Ghosting is a relatively new colloquial dating term that refers to abruptly cutting off contact with someone without giving that person any warning or explanation for doing so. Even when the person being ghosted reaches out to re-initiate contact or gain closure, they're met with silence.

  2. Urban Dictionary: Ghosting

    Ghosting can mean the shutdown /ceasing of communication with someone without notice. This can include but doesn't always require the closing or shutting down of social media accounts or ports of contact such as email addresses or phone numbers.

  3. What Is Ghosting? What It Means, Signs of Ghosting and More

    Ghosting—the practice of ending all communication with someone without giving an explanation—can happen in any type of relationship, including between romantic partners, friends, co-workers and...

  4. Ghosting (behavior)

    In personal relationships People primarily ghost in relationships as a way of avoiding emotional discomfort they are having in a relationship, and are generally not thinking of how it will make the person they are ghosting feel.

  5. What Does Ghosting Mean?

    According to Dictionary, the word ghosting refers to abruptly ending contact with a person without warning or explanation. This most often occurs in romantic relationships and is a frequent practice on online dating apps. When someone ghosts another person, they cut off all contact at every source.

  6. Ghosting: What It Is, Why It Hurts, and What You Can Do About It

    Ghosting Explained What it Means to Ghost and Be Ghosted? What to Do If You're Ghosted You're in a relationship. Suddenly, and maybe without any warning at all, your partner seems to have disappeared. No calls, no text messages, no connection made on social media, no responses to any of your messages.

  7. What Does Ghosting Mean?

    The term ghosting is a slang term that refers to abruptly leaving a social gathering or cutting off contact with someone, typically a romantic partner, without any explanation or warning. It can also be used in the context of gaming to describe the act of observing an opponent's gameplay.

  8. Ghosting In Dating: Why People Do It, How To Respond + More

    According to clinical psychologist Carla Marie Manly, Ph.D., that lack of closure can trigger feelings of uncertainty, confusion, anxiety, and even reduced self-esteem in the person being ghosted. "In general, ghosting is disrespectful and tends to perpetuate patterns of dismissiveness and avoidance," she says.

  9. Ghosting In Relationships: Everything You Need To Know

    "Ghosting" was first mentioned on Urban Dictionary in 2006, and it has since become a recognized term in popular culture. In a 2014 survey of 1,o00 U.S adults by the Huffington Post on ghosting, around 13% of respondents reported being ghosted by someone they were dating. Another 2018 survey found that 72% of respondents had experienced ...

  10. Ghosting Slang: Meaning, Origin, Sentence Examples

    Meaning (Verb) Ghosting is a word that describes the action of a person who disappears without a warning when in the early stages of a romantic relationship. A person ghosting another won't reply or answer calls without giving an explanation. Origin Ghosting was first used back in the early 2000s.

  11. What Is Ghosting?

    Dictionary.com defines ghosting as "the practice of suddenly ending all contact with a person without explanation, especially in a romantic relationship."

  12. Ghosting

    Reviewed by Psychology Today Staff What Is Ghosting? Ghosting is abruptly ending communication with someone without explanation. The concept most often refers to romantic relationships but can...

  13. Ghosting: A Word We're Watching

    Ghosting (the noun) and ghost (the verb) both describe this phenomenon of leaving a relationship of some kind by abruptly ending all contact with the other person, and especially electronic contact, like texts, emails, and chats. Ghosting itself has gotten quite a bit of attention over the last year, but we have evidence of this use of ghost that dates back to 2006.

  14. Ghosting: What Is It and How to Move Past Being Ghosted?

    Ghosting, a term that refers to the sudden disappearance of a friend or romantic interest, can happen for many different reasons. We look at the science behind ghosting, and share tips for what to ...

  15. Ghosting Definition & Meaning

    informal : the act or practice of abruptly cutting off all contact with someone (such as a former romantic partner) usually without explanation by no longer accepting or responding to phone calls, instant messages, etc. Romeo one minute, where'd he go the next?

  16. What is Ghosting?

    "Ghosting" is a term that is commonly used in dating and social relationships to refer to the sudden and unexplained ending of communication or contact with someone. What does ghosting mean? When someone "ghosts" another person, they abruptly stop responding to messages , phone calls, or other forms of communication, and essentially disappear ...

  17. What Does "Ghosting" Mean in Online Dating?

    Ghosting is the act of completely stopping all communication with someone without prior notice, typically with a romantic partner. The person ghosting will ignore texts, calls, and any other forms of reaching out, and will normally not give any explanation to the other person.

  18. Unapologetically Gone: The Science Behind Ghosting

    Ghosting means one person cuts off contact with another after a period of friendship or dating, usually to avoid one's own emotional discomfort. Ghosting 6 Min Read

  19. What Does "Ghost" Mean in Text? A Comprehensive Guide to the Ghosting

    Ghosting refers to completely cutting off communication with someone unexpectedly and without any closure. It's like you're living while they suddenly become a ghost - hence the term. Ghosting can look like: Stopping all texts and calls without warning Excusing yourself from previously planned meetings/dates and going MIA

  20. What Does Ghosted Mean?

    The term ghosted is slang that refers to when someone abruptly ends all communication without any explanation, leaving the other person feeling abandoned. This can occur in various situations, including social gatherings and relationships.

  21. Ghosting

    On this page, we explain what Ghosting means. We also show you how to use it with some examples. It's a small part of the big world of slang, and now you know a bit more about it. If you find any inaccuracy in the meaning/explanation, please do not hesitate to let us know. Let's make the web better for everyone - one slang at a time. 🙂

  22. Ghosting » What does Ghosting mean? » Slang.org

    A slang term for the act of cutting off all communication with someone without any warning beforehand. This can be for simple plans, or to end a relationship. Other definitions of Ghosting: Slang for the act of watching an online streamer who you are currently playing against in a video game.

  23. Ghosting

    Ghosting definition by Slang.net. This page explains what the slang term "Ghosting" means. The various definitions, examples, and related terms listed above have been written and compiled by the Slang.net team. We are constantly updating our database with new slang terms, acronyms, and abbreviations.